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PUTIN: THE MUMMY RETURNS

angelogeorge988

Ah, yes, nothing more quintessentially Soviet than being the grandson of Lenin and Stalin’s cook, in a world where even the most mundane details of daily life carried an air of historical inevitability. Whether someone was cooking your borscht or not, everything somehow tied into the grand narrative of the era. Vladimir Putin’s beginnings—born in Leningrad (now, of course, St. Petersburg, because renaming cities is a form of progress)—perfectly illustrate this blend of the ordinary and the ideological. His mother, a factory worker, and his father, a former submarine sailor, were both anonymous cogs in the vast Soviet machinery, embodying that collective imagination so characteristic of the time. Nothing encapsulates Soviet discipline quite like the fact that, somewhere between borscht and ballistic missiles, between cold and hunger, everyone played their part in this grand spectacle of sacrifice. Always with a smile, of course.

Irony at its finest: the son of a Soviet factory worker and a sailor, raised in poverty and strict discipline, rises not only to lead Russia but to become the architect of a regime that redefines nostalgia—with a personal twist, of course. After all, his ascent in the world of espionage was unlikely to have been the result of any extraordinary talent. Rather, it was a string of perfectly orchestrated Soviet “coincidences.” His school happened to assign him to a German language program—just an administrative formality at the time—but it would become his passport to a future career. While no one would have called him particularly gifted, Putin proved to be the model student, driven by an unwavering loyalty to the communist doctrine. If Marx, Engels, and Lenin weren’t enough to mold him into a soldier of the regime, his fascination with oppressive state structures certainly added a touch of originality to his training. And really, how else could one become a “disciplined cadre” without an almost feverish desire to integrate into that vast, rigid machine? The KGB! That eternal, unconditional love—like a lifelong romance, especially when it paves the way to exactly where you want to be. Even if that path is littered with the landmines of manipulation, terror, and surveillance. Putin, with a heart of stone and a gaze of steel, became a master of political games, applying every lesson learned in the Soviet era to craft a regime where the state seeps almost imperceptibly into daily life, and manipulation is elevated to a science. Unlike Stalin, he never needed an ice pick to eliminate his adversaries—revolutionary brutality was no longer in vogue. Instead, he played the long game, lurking in the shadows, carefully disguising his intentions behind the facade of a statesman, only to eventually find himself “at the head of the feast.” If Trotsky could peer beyond the grave, he might recognize that while there was no ice pick involved, Putin mastered the same cunning maneuvers—with a different ending. No exile, only the quiet, methodical consolidation of power. The comparison to Yeltsin—the “fallen tsar of vodka” who, in a rare moment of alcoholic clarity, handed Russia over to a former KGB agent—might elicit a bitter irony, but also a tacit acknowledgment: a nation’s fate can be steered from the shadows, without the hands holding the reins ever appearing dirty. A judo career beginning at 12—what better preparation for a life dedicated not only to throwing opponents on the tatami but also on the political stage? The ability to unbalance rivals was crucial, for in Russian politics, negotiation skills alone won’t suffice—you must know how to execute your “projection” as well. Just a simple contact sport? Far too little for such a complex character. And so, he had to become a living propaganda fantasy—a modern-day version of a mythological hero. Behold, Putin, swimming through polar ice alongside bears—utterly unverifiable, of course, but perfect for a “real” news report, served up like a cinematic spectacle. And if that scene wasn’t evocative enough, throw in a few shots of him riding a wild horse across the Russian steppe, blending the grandeur of a Roman emperor with the aesthetics of a ’90s pop music video. And if that still wasn’t enough to reinforce the narrative, there he was, at the controls of a fighter jet or miraculously “stumbling upon” ancient amphorae at the bottom of the sea. As the pinnacle of this cult of raw masculinity, tranquilizing Siberian tigers was the perfect touch—a fusion of primal strength and political marketing strategies that would make any global celebrity-politician green with envy. All, of course, under the banner of a supreme leader persona—fearless, omnipotent, and ever-confirmed by each staged photograph and perfectly synchronized propaganda clip. So it’s hardly surprising that another “planetary macho,” Elon Musk—the great champion of grandiose challenges and headline-grabbing provocations—once invited Putin to a man-to-man fight. A relic from an era when conflicts weren’t settled with sanctions and diplomacy but with fists and action-movie combat techniques. Alas, it never moved beyond the realm of casual chatter—an imaginary duel between two self-styled alpha males, each crafting his own mythology, ready to “clash” spectacularly but never actually stepping onto the stage of real confrontation. Reality, however, is another story: a collection of elaborate fables designed to sustain the illusion of invincible power, while in truth, they amount to little more than rattling tin cans making noise in their respective corners of the world. Putin flaunts his virility riding through Siberia, Musk dreams of colonizing Mars, but neither seems willing to do anything beyond hiding behind well-orchestrated PR campaigns and internet-fueled theatrics. For if we are to speak honestly, Putin is neither a strategic genius nor an impressive orator, and his charisma is more an illusion—carefully crafted to maintain a certain public fascination. Both he and Musk are players in a global spectacle, where the real stakes remain hidden behind grand promises.

Putin, in this business of history, is precisely the kind of figure you might pass by unnoticed in an alternate universe—someone you wouldn’t give a second thought. Without that peculiar mix of circumstances, bureaucratic loyalty, and, of course, Soviet nostalgia that propelled him forward, he wouldn’t just have failed to reach the pinnacle of Russian power—he might have struggled to find a job at all. In a “normal” world of job interviews and résumés, he would likely have been a shadow behind some anonymous desk, a mid-level functionary without much enthusiasm, perhaps a mediocre administrator, or at best, a dour security officer checking passports in a forgotten corner of the world. But history, with all its irony and caprice, placed him at the helm of Russia—a country where the absence of striking charisma and clear vision can be compensated for with an iron grip and the right people in the right places. Everything hinges on power, fear, and manipulation—tools far more effective than any real competence in a world governed by political maneuvering. And so we arrive at the two great moments of his life—the events that cemented his place not only in Russia’s memory but in the image he has projected to the world. The first crucial moment in Putin’s career—and perhaps the most defining—is, without a doubt, the devastating war he unleashed, an absurd bloodbath in which millions of young lives were sacrificed for an illusory goal: territory and victory at any cost. A grim illusion, because even if he were to annex Ukraine and win the war, sooner or later, Russia itself would unravel. Like all great empires before it, it will ultimately collapse under its own contradictions, economic frailties, and simmering unrest. Russia is not an indomitable colossus; it does not possess the “exceptionalism” that Putin and other leaders would like to believe. Take Britain as an example—once a vast empire, dominant across continents, seemingly unshakable during the First World War. And yet, within a few decades, it was reduced to a fragile island, divided and plagued by internal crises. History does not forgive, and Russia will not defy this law. With a weak economy and a society trapped in an autocratic regime, Putin may seize territories, but he cannot stop the inevitable—the imperial ruins already taking shape in Russia’s future, no matter how much land he wrests by force. And yet, he continues to play the game, feeding myths of power and lost grandeur. But even the most cunning rulers cannot escape the natural law of imperial decline—and this, inevitably, will be Russia’s fate, no matter how long he tries to delay it. This passage reflects a deeply critical perspective on Vladimir Putin’s rise to power, presenting him as a figure propelled not by exceptional talent or strategic brilliance, but by a confluence of Soviet-era circumstances, political opportunism, and a carefully crafted myth of power. The author paints Putin as a product of Soviet structures—highlighting his early years, his career in the KGB, and his ascent through a rigid system built on loyalty and manipulation.

The narrative emphasizes the absurdity and tragedy of the war Putin initiated, casting it as a pointless sacrifice of young lives in pursuit of an illusory imperial dream. The author argues that, regardless of territorial gains, Russia will eventually crumble under the weight of its own contradictions, economic frailty, and internal discontent—just as previous empires have fallen. Putin’s image as a master of propaganda and manipulation is juxtaposed with a portrayal of him as a figure lacking true charisma or strategic genius. His public persona, fueled by staged media appearances and a mythic portrayal of masculinity, is described as a deliberate construction aimed at maintaining a facade of strength and power. The irony of his rise and his eventual fall is underscored, suggesting that, despite his claims of grandeur, Putin will not escape the fate of all empires: disintegration and irrelevance. The passage concludes with a reflection on the cyclical nature of history, suggesting that Putin’s legacy will be reduced to a hollow relic, much like the idolization of past figures like Lenin. This is a stark critique of Putin’s leadership, focusing on the political gamesmanship and manipulation that have defined his tenure, while also questioning the lasting significance of his power in the grand sweep of history.

 
 
 

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